Notes from a Small Island

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Bill Bryson was born in Des Moines, Iowa, in 1951. He settled in England in 1977, and lived for many years with his English wife and four children in North Yorkshire. He and his family now live in the United States. Such moments were fleeting, however, before he returned to rants about shopping centres, architecture and urbanisation. Repeatedly reminiscing about his journalism days was boring too - I don’t read travel books to learn about office jobs, Bill! Near the Churchill, now itself peacefully sleeping, I came across an old guy walking a little dog. The dog was frantically trying to pee on every vertical surface and in consequence wasn’t so much walking as being dragged along on three legs.

Aspects haven't aged well – whether it be outdated statistics, certain remarks, or a surprising reference to my city of Hobart (10,000 miles away) that no longer holds true. So far all his books have enjoyable moments, but for example with is dry sarcastic comments, sometimes what he says is spot on, other times he goes too far and I would have thought that a man of his age and experience, should know when to stop out of consideration, just to avoid being offensive or inappropriate but he doesn’t, not always anyway. Besides I never know when he is serious or when he describes a situation according to what he would have liked to have done or is it something he actually did? Not that the answer to this question is always important or relevant to enjoy what he is saying. Bill Bryson's hilarious tour of his adopted country- the book that was voted the nation's favourite book on modern Britain in a World Book Day BBC poll.

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I'll say this about the man. He's gifted with words. I have a penchant for English vernacular and a British sense of humor and Bryson does possess it in spades. All this despite his coming from a part of America in which the corn dog is a crowning cultural achievement. But you know Goebbels was pretty good with words too and I wasn't a fan. I know what you're thinking. The comparison is not fair. (If you're in doubt, I do mean to Bryson, not Goebbels). A recurring issue that I have with Mr. Bryson is that he is often too sarcastic and mean for my tastes. There is a hint of nastiness that seems to hang around the edges of most of his actions and observations. And just as you want to tell him to ‘sod off’ he will write endearingly about a place that he found lovely despite its bad reputation and you delay throwing the book across the room. A great example of this is when he wrote about his visit to the town of Wigan.

As I stood there absorbing the realization that my nightmare, far from drawing to a close, was only just beginning, the door opened and Mrs Smegma was striding across the room to the strip light above the sink. She had shown me the correct method for turning it on `There’s no need to yank it. A gentle tug is sufficient’ ± and evidently remembered that she had left it burning. She turned it off now with what seemed to me a sharp yank, then gave me and the room a final suspicious once-over, and departed again. Did you know that there are 445000 listed buildings and 12000 medieval churches in the UK? Did you know that it took six hundred men to drag 50 tons of stone 18 miles, to build Stone Henge? And not only that, but they had to repeat the process twenty times.Are you worried the locals and the other tourists will laugh at you? It's better to be ready for anything than wet and cold, so relax, and enjoy the view: The book was adapted for Carlton Television in 1998 and appeared as a six-part 30-minute documentary broadcast on ITV from 10 January to 14 February 1999. The book is also available in audio book format. You can’t go wrong by asking an American who’s now a resident of the UK about its people, culture and geography. Here are some key points from Bill Bryson that highlight his thoughts on those topics.

Bacon and Eggs, early morning rain and cold... I remember it so well. Cold wind Swept port towns dark and closed. Yep remember those well. I loved that Notes from a Small Island transported me from the couch to Great Britain. I hated that Bill Bryson, at his grumpy and condescending worst, was my travel companion. Ah, I need a cup of tea.He explains why the British would have coped well under Communism (good at queuing, tolerant of dictatorships (cf Mrs Thatcher) and boring food). He throws in potted history about the founder of Sainsbury and his mansion (but doesn’t bother to find out why it was left to rot) and the fact that the bicycle pedal was invented in Scotland. All of this came to me in the space of a lingering moment. I've said it before and I'll say it again. I like it here. I like it more than I can tell you.” the sort of person your P.E. teacher warned that you would turn into if you masturbated too extravagantly (someone, in short, like your P.E. teacher).